Can happy children grow up in unhappy families? What mom teaches.

I'm going to training. I solve a sudoku, a long way, I train a brain. I never listened to the conversations of passengers. But this dialogue can be safely clothe in article form. Mother with daughter. The girl is 10−12, my mother - a little more than 30. Modern beautiful lady. True, the conversation was a little louder than usual. At first they swore. Mom was unhappy that her daughter did not obey. The usual conversation, nothing unremarkable, even a little annoying. And suddenly mom started to give out pearls.

“If you don’t obey me, you will never marry an oil tycoon!”
- Why didn't you come out? Too mom did not obey?
- No, my mother since childhood inspired me that I was terrible and stupid, so I am not worthy of a rich and successful husband. And so your dad is a drunkard and a bungler.
“But he’s not the grandmother who chose him, but you.” (Baby, and hit the mark!)
- Of course it's me. But I didn’t believe in myself, I thought it was really scary and stupid. But if you wash your pants and socks - just marry an oil tycoon!

I did not expect such a turn of conversation at all. Well, the proposals of the magnates with socks and shorts do not add up to me ... Maybe my mother didn’t tell me something in childhood either? The terrible secret of happiness is not revealed? The conversation went on.

- So you now look for yourself mogul.
- No, while I was married to your drunk father, all the magnates were dismantled. I now ride a trolley bus, and they are in jeeps. How can we meet?

I really wanted to check with my mother in which store and at what time they hand out oil magnates. Why precisely oil? And what a measure of success - a jeep?

Mom and daughter had to go out, and in parting she made another call to her mom: “Do you have any decent candy boxes?” I need to make a gift. I received a completely natural answer - they say, buy it in a store, there is no problem with that ...

They left, and I thought. This young woman was once crippled by the absurd education of her mother. And how can she raise a happy person herself if her model of life teaches something completely different? And most importantly, she is looking for the culprit of their misfortunes in other people. In this case, in his mother. And a child of 10 years already understands that a person is responsible both for his choice and for his happiness and unhappiness. What is your world, you build it yourself, as you can. The girl understands this, only while she cannot clothe the verbal form so that the young mother will understand.

But the easiest way to find someone responsible for your misfortunes. Who is guilty? The eternal question. To whom to blame? On country, government, weather, mother, teachers. And you? What did you do to break out of the vicious circle of life that you hate? Fearfully? Difficult? Of course! Only, without making this very first step, you still won’t understand how to change your life, and what is good for you personally.

As often and to me, my mother, who lived a hard life, said: "Do not go, stop, this is not for you!". Why not for me? I tried, and I did it. I took off, and the wings carried me. I sang, and my song flowed ... Mom, of course, rejoices at my success and is surprised at my hardening, when after a defeat I start all over again. Survives and suffers, like any mother. I ask her only one thing - do not interfere! I always share my successes, and turn problems into tasks. Why upset her?

Parents! Do not stop your children from becoming happy. Do not put on them your "costumes", your life scenarios. Let them take off themselves! Even if they burn their wings, they will know that there is another life. That there is a rainbow outside the window. What in the world is a lot of sun. And life is full of abundance. Need only to want! After all, there is no guarantee that every girl who washes her laundry every day will marry an oil magnate. Although the bride in the dirty, he is unlikely to choose ...

Watch the video: I DISCOVERED my parent's terrible SECRET (February 2020).

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